What a twat

My computer now remembers this title, which, once again goes to Matty hayden.

"What is your definition of Australianism?
Uncompromising, very hardworking, fantastic mateship, belief in one another, incredible pride for the country, and being very balanced."

Aren't the first 5 characteristics a contradiction with the last?

I've got a feeling that the font being used here was last used in 'Lords of Midnight' on the Spectrum.

England v India

Its not going very well is it? On the positive side, we've called up Amjad Khan. A bit of viking balls is what is needed. furthermore, it may mean that lisbeth might, just might, have an interest in cricket.

Aus-NZ

May I be the first to say ha ha ha ha ha ha.

what a twat

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48eHkZfnGug

this is beyond appalling.

Pat

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Edit: Thought I'd embed it as well for you. x, KP.

speechless....

this is probably the best/worst thing you will ever see in your life:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48eHkZfnGug

I can't say anymore.

Pat

Great Victorian

Lawry link, as promised.

Whimsy

After the latest hilarious instalment of England's 'Can't chase, Won't chase', we are in dire need of whimsy. I've left all my Wisdens at home- can anyone help?

It's good to see Pakistan playing and winning again. No-one will tour there because of all the bombs and that, but haven't there also been bombs going off in India? And yet no-one seems too worried about it. I wonder why that is.

Olden days cricket- well mental!

As an antidote to England getting fisted royally far away, I was trawling through my copy of Wisden 1923 last night, and came across an account of Warwickshire against Hampshire at Edgbaston in that year. In reply to Warwickshire's 220, Hampshire were all out for 15. Following on, they were still in deep trouble as they reached 186 for 6. Wonderfully, from there they made a second innings total of 523 and won the match by 155 runs.
Olden days cricket- well mental!

Why Ravi Bopara doesn't get picked much...

Pietersen doesn't rate him.

That is all.

Don't imagine that running his skipper out has improved that opinion, either.

On Ishant Scharma:

"High praise indeed, and well merited for 15 wickets at 27 on four pitches that gave the fast bowlers next to no encouragement. Ishant is now in the situation that Shane Warne was after his dramatic progress in 1992-93, and how India utilise his talent will be central to plans of global domination. There's no doubt that he has all the attributes required to be the best fast bowler in the world, but on the subcontinent that isn't enough. We were saying the same things about Mohammad Asif three years ago, and look where the misguided fool is now."

Seems harsh on Asif.

"Brad Haddin has a difficult job being the next man after Adam Gilchrist, but his standards during this series were low. India is not an easy place to keep wicket, but Haddin made it look particularly hard. It seemed that in every innings he was taking his glove off and shaking his hand in pain due to a fumble, which can't give the bowlers much confidence.

In the first Test he let through 39 byes, but improved significantly, not giving away more than 10 in a match for the rest of the series. However, the fumbles didn't stop and, as the wicketkeeper sets the tone, they spread through the side. In the last game Haddin made a strange error when he threw his glove at the ball to stop it going past him, costing the side five penalty runs. It wasn't the kind of move expected of a man who captains his state and has been waiting for years for a full-time promotion.

Haddin's batting was always a worry, especially his poor shot selection, and he battled to 163 runs at 27.16. Like Gilchrist, he is desperate to attack, but is much better at picking the wrong ball to hit. The Indians knew he would get himself out and he did. In Mohali he drove wildly at Harbhajan Singh's first flighted offbreak outside off stump and was bowled. On Monday he chipped Amit Mishra limply to mid-off. They were the shots of a one-day player, not those of a Test No. 7. It was only Haddin's second series and he should have some time at home to show what he can do, but he must improve in both disciplines if he is to be a regular in the side."

Throwing his glove at the ball....for fuck's sake!

JJ Krejza 20.5 1 113 2 5.42

Do I like that...

Pat

the s word

Well, there you are. For all you high-minded, principled tossers who pay so little heed to stanford that you don't even know what the score was, we got dicked. It was, however, not as simple as that. It was in fact a devilishly brilliant plan by the england management and team that achieved two things. Firstly, by losing so ridiculously, they robbed stanford's showpiece event of any drama or interest whatsoever, except for the 11 blokes who pocketed a million bucks, and who will now proceed to perform for the west indies as though they don't give a fuck. Secondly, and this must have been planned in tandem with the aussies, by capitulating in such a pusillanimous manner, they have highlighted how profoundly worthless 20/20 is compared with the drama of two fantastic teams going at it for five days.
Trust me- this is the only explanation for what happened.